Some of what you are reading may well prove useful later. History and culture both will likely be cornerstones of future investigations into this world.
Truly, that's not—
[ Oh, she knows better by now. Shaking her head, she changes her reply. ]
necessary but if you insist, I will not refuse you. Why don't we meet at the northern corner of the Crystal Gardens? We can take a long walk alongside them, and you can then choose our final destination.
Dohalim, I have lived here since after the events of Kiichpan. I have traveled elsewhere, in safe company, but you do not need to worry about incense in my case.
That you value my safety means a great deal to me. I am glad I can at least reassure you that such caution is not needed, at least not on this occasion.
I will see you shortly then!
[ And wait she will, seated on a bench outside the gardens, gaze skyward in thought. Lacking any mage talent, entering proper would be unwise, and denied to her besides.
While her preference for dark colours is unchanged, Sophia has at least given over to the local styles, and fingers absently smooth the huipil worn over her dress. It's only when familiar red hair is noticed at a distance that she rises, lifting a hand to wave in greeting.
[Very well. Possibly too well, given all that has happened since they last met. Dohalim is incredibly skilled at compartmentalization, after all. Has he had his head stuck in the sand since Kiichpan, or has he simply found happiness in Coatepec?
If Dohalim was completely honest with himself, it's likely a little of both. Not that it stops him from approaching the world in his slightly out of touch, but entirely well-meaning fashion.]
Sophia, your beauty rivals that of the gardens themselves.
[And speaking of fashion, it seems they've both relaxed in their personal styles to better suit the weather and culture. Dohalim stands tall in simple, exquisitely tailored white linen robes of Copalli design, elevated by the addition of his customary golden adornments.
It's better to be overdressed than underdressed, no matter the world.]
Please, there's no need to stand on my account. If you sit, so shall I.
[ The flattery gets a soft laugh, Sophia offering both hands to her friend in welcome. All the better to draw him over to the bench to join her, in fact, even as she shakes her head at him. There is at least a little shade overhead, crystal boughs clinking in the wind. ]
I see some things never change. [and she's glad of it, even if she feigns some exasperation in the moment.] Though I have no doubt you say so to many of your friends when the moment strikes.
...It's been too long. I am sorry I haven't called on you more often lately. [her expression softens] How are you?
I still have eyes, so I don't see why things would. The local fashion is very becoming on you. That I make an effort to compliment those whom I admire doesn't detract from my sincerity, I assure you.
[Dohalim takes a seat beside her, gently squeezing her pale hands within his own. It has been some time since they've seen one another face to face. He can't help taking a moment to study her at a closer proximity, looking for signs of distress.]
Please, I could have reached out to you just as easily. Losing myself in my studies is something of an unfortunate habit of mine. As for how I fare-- very well, now that Coatepec has returned to some semblance of quiet.
And you? While it's always lovely to spend time in your company, it seems you called me here for a reason.
You've taken to it well, too. With some keeping of your original style, if I'm not mistaken? [trust Dohalim to be a trend setter, honestly.] And I have learned to never doubt your sincerity.
[ Or the fact he's ready to get right to the heart of the matter that she called him for - emphasis on heart, even if the way her lips purse and expression shifts is less...distress, and more a mix of resignation and ruefulness. ]
I...[a sigh] I'm not entirely sure how to start. And you may find it a very foolish request when I'm done.
Of course. Fashion is as much in the wearer's heart as the eye of the beholder. If one dresses without thought to their own personal taste and aesthetic... they aren't wearing their attire, their attire is wearing them.
[Dohalim lays his ringed hand upon her hand, dark eyes fixed on her face. Sophia has his undivided attention.]
Ah, but you forget who you're speaking to. If you're looking for a partner in foolish endeavours, you've found him.
[ All that attention, and Sophia can almost feel herself beginning to sweat in a manner that has nothing to do with the sun beating down over their heads. However, she did ask, and he has answered, and there is certainly tension in the hand held by Dohalim's. ]
Well. I've been trying to avoid foolishness. But in spite of myself, I think, I— That is to say... I've been—
[ Her face scrunches up, before an 'ugh!' escapes her throat and her hands are pulled away - so they can cover her face, which is beginning to show hints of rosy colour. ]
[muffled muttering from behind her palms] This is so stupid..I'm too old to have a crush.
When one has set aside said pursuit for the greater good, they find themselves very out of practice where the 'how' is concerned. Even at thirty on—two.
[ There's a definite huff to her words, even as she reluctantly lets Dohalim peel her hands away, tension evident around her eyes. ]
But it is embarrassing. And I don't think luck has anything to do with it, Dohalim. If there's any fortune to be had, it's that he hasn't noticed.
[ She can't seem to decide if she should be happy about that or not, however. ]
While I understand your hesitation, given I was in much the same place as you for some time... it seems you are creating a vicious cycle.
If you don't try because you lack confidence and you're out of practice, then you're effectively eliminating your chance to gain confidence through practice.
[Dohalim's going to keep hold of her hands, to prevent any future instances of turtling.]
And you also have yet to name this fellow. The more information you provide, the better I am able to help you. Who is this mystery man, and what about him do you find appealing?
You make that sound so easy. [and here she sits, unconvinced yet.] But I don't want to risk the friendship I already have due to feelings he can't return.
[ She seems oddly certain of it, moron that she is in emotional matters. Yet did she not ask Dohalim here for help on this? Perhaps some small part of her is already regretting doing so, but Sophia isn't going to have the option to back out now.
She bites her lower lip. He was right to call her out on her lack of poise; she's hardly a schoolgirl after all. ]
I have your word, that you won't say anything to him? Or anyone else?
Nothing worth achieving in life is simple or easy.
[He doesn't quite roll his eyes, but there is a sigh along with the nod of affirmation.]
You have my word I will not interfere. That said, how do you know he cannot or will not return your feelings if he is unaware of the fact you have them to begin with?
Don't make the mistake of putting the starship ahead of the engine.
I think I've gotten to know him well enough over these last few months to recognise when someone is...emotionally unavailable. [Her words are very quiet suddenly.] And meeting his late wife in the dream bubbles simply solidified that.
..Which is when I realised what my own feelings were, ironically enough. Hence why I feel very foolish. [she gives Dohalim a sad smile.] I think I would have liked her, had we met in some other time and place.
[ Ah, but she hasn't said a name yet, has she? She turns her gaze away, not out to the city proper, but to one side, towards the inner gardens of crystaline shards. ]
..Kratos. I'm talking about Kratos.
Edited (whoops, wrong html tag!) 2022-05-26 22:57 (UTC)
[Of course it's Kratos. Sophia had spoken of him fondly before, and if they are still living with one another it's natural they've grown closer.]
If he is emotionally unavailable, then what is it about him you find attractive? I would imagine he must have many redeeming qualities to have earned your interest.
As I said, do not put the starship ahead of the engine. If you remember, Zephyr was also married once, and to a very wonderful woman whom I cannot hope to replace-- and whom Zephyr did not wish for me to replace.
It was my own ego and fear of inadequacy that was creating tension between us, rather than disinterest on his part, and I fear you may be in the same position.
[Mentioning his own bond with Zephyr draws out a brighter smile] I wasn't entirely sure how things stood between you two, but you spoke of him so fondly, so passionately.. I am glad to hear that things have worked out between you.
[ She's not entirely sure if she's embarrassed about this or not - months ago, she had truthfully told Dohalim that she was just friends with the man in question.
But what had been expected to only be a weeks' stay has now led to a permanent home. Not something either Sophia or Kratos had intended, but he had yet to ask her to leave. And she'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy his company. ]
Well, I— I mean, he— [she takes a pause, and a breath. She's overthinking things, surely she can say something about why she cares.] He's..thoughtful. And kind behind his sternness. And unintentionally funny. I think he's started to relearn how his sense of humour works because of it. He's..led a very long, very different life to anyone I've ever known. And he's trying to do better than in the past. Change is so hard, and he'd be the first to tell you of the mistakes he's made..but he's facing them. And I admire that.
But I don't want or intend to replace anyone. [the stricken look on her face reveals what she doesn't say: that she fears being accused of such.] That's why the timing, for realizing my feelings, couldn't really be any worse...I couldn't do that to him, or Lloyd.
I would go so far as to say things are going very well between us. He is entirely perfect in every way, and I will spend the rest of my life attempting to be worthy of him. If a man such as myself can find love, then there's no reason a woman such as yourself cannot.
[Dohalim listens to her, chin in hand. As a romantic at heart all this talk of love and paramours is balm for the soul.
Besides, his reputation as a match-maker may be at stake. If he can't bring these two fools together, who can?]
I understand your concern, however, as I learned-- you cannot and will not replace anyone. Even if you so wished to. You are a different woman than his late wife, and you are not Lloyd's mother.
Clearly I have not become Law's mother in any regard.
That's wonderful. [and she means it, squeezing his hands gently in emphasis.] And I have no doubt you are already worthy in his eyes, Dohalim. Have a care not to place him on a pedestal so high. Though I know that's easy to say, and less so to do, where love is concerned.
[ Her tone isn't particularly sappy, but there's a softness, a quiet happy warmth, that she doesn't entirely notice about herself - or, perhaps, she does, and that's part of the internal struggle. Sophia has never particularly considered herself a romantic before.
She does relax a little at the reassurances, however, a sidelong glance away hinting at how foolish she feels for such worries, but his grip on her hands is at least returned. ]
No, I am not, and I'm sure Law would have words for you if you tried such a thing. [the teasing tone is light, but brief.] ...I don't know, Dohalim. What if I'm reading too much into it? I don't even know how I'd tell him to begin with.
If he and I were ordinary men of no consequence, it would be different, but... there is a history between us that cannot be ignored. My people abused and enslaved his people. His murderer was my peer.
You, if you may pardon my saying so... are blessed enough to have a clean slate with this man. I won't say there's no risk, but there is also incredible reward. Telling him is as simple as telling him.
[Now it's his turn to squeeze her hand, and pull her closer so he may speak more softly as a group of healers pass.]
If you don't, some other bolder man or woman may approach him first. How would that make you feel?
I remember what you told me, about your position, and what your people did on Dahna. [Her expression turns somber.] I also knew that..Zephyr's journey had ended, though not how. And yet you've both overcome such a distance. That's no small thing, Dohalim.
[ A clean slate? Is that really the way to look at it? Sophia falls silent, considering, but Dohalim is almost making this sound far more simple than it actually is. ...isn't he?
She leans in when he pulls her closer. Then there's a faintest huff; not quite laughter.] Truthfully? I...don't know that I have much to fear on that front. Perhaps it is simply due to his age, but Kratos is, ah, hardly what many would consider the most sociable.
But.. [more softly:] What if I do ask, and, he says no?
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I do not, but, I am sure I can make my way to you without too much trouble.
[ And maybe, just maybe, her usual choice of escort might be related to what she wants to talk about. ]
Where should I meet you?
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Sophia, if you require an escort than at least allow me to meet you halfway.
That said, maybe it would be entirely easier if I'm the one who makes the trek to you.
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Truly, that's not—
[ Oh, she knows better by now. Shaking her head, she changes her reply. ]
necessary but if you insist, I will not refuse you. Why don't we meet at the northern corner of the Crystal Gardens? We can take a long walk alongside them, and you can then choose our final destination.
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Dohalim, I have lived here since after the events of Kiichpan. I have traveled elsewhere, in safe company, but you do not need to worry about incense in my case.
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Life is ever so fragile.
Very well. We will meet at the Crystal Gardens.
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I will see you shortly then!
[ And wait she will, seated on a bench outside the gardens, gaze skyward in thought. Lacking any mage talent, entering proper would be unwise, and denied to her besides.
While her preference for dark colours is unchanged, Sophia has at least given over to the local styles, and fingers absently smooth the huipil worn over her dress. It's only when familiar red hair is noticed at a distance that she rises, lifting a hand to wave in greeting.
It is a relief to see him looking so well. ]
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If Dohalim was completely honest with himself, it's likely a little of both. Not that it stops him from approaching the world in his slightly out of touch, but entirely well-meaning fashion.]
Sophia, your beauty rivals that of the gardens themselves.
[And speaking of fashion, it seems they've both relaxed in their personal styles to better suit the weather and culture. Dohalim stands tall in simple, exquisitely tailored white linen robes of Copalli design, elevated by the addition of his customary golden adornments.
It's better to be overdressed than underdressed, no matter the world.]
Please, there's no need to stand on my account. If you sit, so shall I.
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I see some things never change. [and she's glad of it, even if she feigns some exasperation in the moment.] Though I have no doubt you say so to many of your friends when the moment strikes.
...It's been too long. I am sorry I haven't called on you more often lately. [her expression softens] How are you?
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[Dohalim takes a seat beside her, gently squeezing her pale hands within his own. It has been some time since they've seen one another face to face. He can't help taking a moment to study her at a closer proximity, looking for signs of distress.]
Please, I could have reached out to you just as easily. Losing myself in my studies is something of an unfortunate habit of mine. As for how I fare-- very well, now that Coatepec has returned to some semblance of quiet.
And you? While it's always lovely to spend time in your company, it seems you called me here for a reason.
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[ Or the fact he's ready to get right to the heart of the matter that she called him for - emphasis on heart, even if the way her lips purse and expression shifts is less...distress, and more a mix of resignation and ruefulness. ]
I...[a sigh] I'm not entirely sure how to start. And you may find it a very foolish request when I'm done.
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[Dohalim lays his ringed hand upon her hand, dark eyes fixed on her face. Sophia has his undivided attention.]
Ah, but you forget who you're speaking to. If you're looking for a partner in foolish endeavours, you've found him.
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Well. I've been trying to avoid foolishness. But in spite of myself, I think, I— That is to say... I've been—
[ Her face scrunches up, before an 'ugh!' escapes her throat and her hands are pulled away - so they can cover her face, which is beginning to show hints of rosy colour. ]
[muffled muttering from behind her palms] This is so stupid..I'm too old to have a crush.
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[As a fellow woman (and not a child) Dohalim clearly knows what he's talking about.
A gentle tug at Sophia's wrists, attempting to peel her hands away from her face with a tut.]
Come now. There is no issue with the 'crush' itself, it's your behaviour in regards to said crush that may be perceived as embarrassing.
Have some poise, woman.
You're in your prime. Whoever this person is, they should count themselves lucky to be the object of your affections.
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[ There's a definite huff to her words, even as she reluctantly lets Dohalim peel her hands away, tension evident around her eyes. ]
But it is embarrassing. And I don't think luck has anything to do with it, Dohalim. If there's any fortune to be had, it's that he hasn't noticed.
[ She can't seem to decide if she should be happy about that or not, however. ]
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If you don't try because you lack confidence and you're out of practice, then you're effectively eliminating your chance to gain confidence through practice.
[Dohalim's going to keep hold of her hands, to prevent any future instances of turtling.]
And you also have yet to name this fellow. The more information you provide, the better I am able to help you. Who is this mystery man, and what about him do you find appealing?
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[ She seems oddly certain of it, moron that she is in emotional matters. Yet did she not ask Dohalim here for help on this? Perhaps some small part of her is already regretting doing so, but Sophia isn't going to have the option to back out now.
She bites her lower lip. He was right to call her out on her lack of poise; she's hardly a schoolgirl after all. ]
I have your word, that you won't say anything to him? Or anyone else?
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[He doesn't quite roll his eyes, but there is a sigh along with the nod of affirmation.]
You have my word I will not interfere. That said, how do you know he cannot or will not return your feelings if he is unaware of the fact you have them to begin with?
Don't make the mistake of putting the starship ahead of the engine.
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..Which is when I realised what my own feelings were, ironically enough. Hence why I feel very foolish. [she gives Dohalim a sad smile.] I think I would have liked her, had we met in some other time and place.
[ Ah, but she hasn't said a name yet, has she? She turns her gaze away, not out to the city proper, but to one side, towards the inner gardens of crystaline shards. ]
..Kratos. I'm talking about Kratos.
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[Of course it's Kratos. Sophia had spoken of him fondly before, and if they are still living with one another it's natural they've grown closer.]
If he is emotionally unavailable, then what is it about him you find attractive? I would imagine he must have many redeeming qualities to have earned your interest.
As I said, do not put the starship ahead of the engine. If you remember, Zephyr was also married once, and to a very wonderful woman whom I cannot hope to replace-- and whom Zephyr did not wish for me to replace.
It was my own ego and fear of inadequacy that was creating tension between us, rather than disinterest on his part, and I fear you may be in the same position.
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[ She's not entirely sure if she's embarrassed about this or not - months ago, she had truthfully told Dohalim that she was just friends with the man in question.
But what had been expected to only be a weeks' stay has now led to a permanent home. Not something either Sophia or Kratos had intended, but he had yet to ask her to leave. And she'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy his company. ]
Well, I— I mean, he— [she takes a pause, and a breath. She's overthinking things, surely she can say something about why she cares.] He's..thoughtful. And kind behind his sternness. And unintentionally funny. I think he's started to relearn how his sense of humour works because of it. He's..led a very long, very different life to anyone I've ever known. And he's trying to do better than in the past. Change is so hard, and he'd be the first to tell you of the mistakes he's made..but he's facing them. And I admire that.
But I don't want or intend to replace anyone. [the stricken look on her face reveals what she doesn't say: that she fears being accused of such.] That's why the timing, for realizing my feelings, couldn't really be any worse...I couldn't do that to him, or Lloyd.
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[Dohalim listens to her, chin in hand. As a romantic at heart all this talk of love and paramours is balm for the soul.
Besides, his reputation as a match-maker may be at stake. If he can't bring these two fools together, who can?]
I understand your concern, however, as I learned-- you cannot and will not replace anyone. Even if you so wished to. You are a different woman than his late wife, and you are not Lloyd's mother.
Clearly I have not become Law's mother in any regard.
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[ Her tone isn't particularly sappy, but there's a softness, a quiet happy warmth, that she doesn't entirely notice about herself - or, perhaps, she does, and that's part of the internal struggle. Sophia has never particularly considered herself a romantic before.
She does relax a little at the reassurances, however, a sidelong glance away hinting at how foolish she feels for such worries, but his grip on her hands is at least returned. ]
No, I am not, and I'm sure Law would have words for you if you tried such a thing. [the teasing tone is light, but brief.] ...I don't know, Dohalim. What if I'm reading too much into it? I don't even know how I'd tell him to begin with.
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You, if you may pardon my saying so... are blessed enough to have a clean slate with this man. I won't say there's no risk, but there is also incredible reward. Telling him is as simple as telling him.
[Now it's his turn to squeeze her hand, and pull her closer so he may speak more softly as a group of healers pass.]
If you don't, some other bolder man or woman may approach him first. How would that make you feel?
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[ A clean slate? Is that really the way to look at it? Sophia falls silent, considering, but Dohalim is almost making this sound far more simple than it actually is. ...isn't he?
She leans in when he pulls her closer. Then there's a faintest huff; not quite laughter.] Truthfully? I...don't know that I have much to fear on that front. Perhaps it is simply due to his age, but Kratos is, ah, hardly what many would consider the most sociable.
But.. [more softly:] What if I do ask, and, he says no?
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